I usually wake up to, "Get up now, mama!" That's Cecilia. Bossy little thing, for only two years old. I have NO IDEA where she gets the bossiness. Couldn't possibly be from me? My friend Jackie, who I should fondly refer to as Jackie Sedaris, started posting videos on youtube of her son, Hudson, giving her other son, five month old Quinlan tutorials on how to play with different toys or what is a sweet potato, stuff like that. I want to start posting videos, but it could take me years to find the right cords and navigate through youtube, so you'll just have to depend on my description of how suddenly, at dinner tonight, Francesca busted out a five minute monologue on how she wants to be a "fire jet plane driver, with fire shooting out the back, and Cecilia in the front with her and you and daddy in the back of the plane, with the fire shooting out from behind you and I will drive us to Mexico and not run into the geese." I swear to make more effort on getting some pictures and videos up because that was hilarious. And the geese thing . . . my dad came over the other day for lunch and asked me if I'd heard about the plane crash. He then proceeded to tell us all about the pilot who safely landed the plane into the Hudson River after hitting a goose. Francesca was completely quiet, listening to the story and then asked with tears in her eyes, "What happened to the goose." I was like, "Uh oh." Dad tried to break it to her gently, but she sat there with her head in her hands and tried not to cry for about five minutes while we tried to explain away the pain. I think she's not used to any kind of violence so it really hurts her feelings. Plus, living so close to the river, we watch the geese fly right over our house a lot. I explained that New York City is really, really far away from here and that those weren't 'our' geese. That helped, but I could tell that it left a dent.
Tonight, after bath time, Francesca came running at me, with her jammies in hand asking if I would put her hair in a bun. I paused and thought of why she would want this, then realized it was so that her wet hair didn't make her back cold. I held her hair while she put on her jammies and asked, "Don't you want to put on any lotion?" She answered, "No, I like being itchy. Yeah - I like being all ITCHY (said with wrinkled nose and in a horse voice.) I like being itchy because then its fun for Daddy to scratch my back." On paper, it doesn't sound all that funny, but man . . . this was funny.
The biggest event of the day was on our way home from 'school' at our friend Heather's house when Francesca started yelling something to me from the bike trailer. I couldn't understand what she was saying, so I pulled over, "MICKY MOUSE DOLL BACK THERE! MICKY MOUSE DOLL ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD BACK THERE." "Really?" I asked, not really wanting to double back. She insisted, so I doubled back and sure enough, there right on the side of the road (how could I have missed it?) was a filthy, sticker filled, probably someone's dog toy, abandoned old Micky Mouse. I picked it up and put it in the back of the bike trailer. We had to wash it before playing with it. It is as big as Cecilia. I put it in the washing machine and then had to stitch a hole, but they love it. Francesca is sleeping with it right now. Since she's never seen any cartoons with Micky Mouse (or anything else) SHE has her own persona. First of all, they've called him, HER from the get go. They took off the red "underwear" and put a pink dress on her. I totally adore that they are so clueless when it comes to pop culture. This will probably come back to bite me in t he *ss, (like they will probably grow up to be comparable to a couple Japanese tourists and LOVE everything American pop culture has to offer, Hannah Montana, MTV, McDonald's, and whatever else I'm missing) but for now, I'm loving it.
I heard Francesca playing with her Calico Critters today and she was saying "this one is me, and this one is Mr. Clark. I'm married to Mr. Clark." Mr. Clark is the old cowboy that owns the huge draft horses that give free rides at Christmas time.
Man, I can't believe Cecilia's stuttering just vanished. She is totally OFF the dairy and wheat. She won't touch it. At Heather's house today, she put out some huge slices of cheese and Cecilia said, "cheese give me tummy ache, but celery didn't!" as she reached for a piece of celery. Afterwards, when we stopped at Mumzel's on the way home because Francesca was starving and I was out of snacks, Francesca chowed down on a piece of banana bread while Cecilia sipped juice without a complaint, "Banana bread have dairy. Banana bread have wheat in it." This whole diet thing has made me realize that this is the first time in my life that I've ever had to watch what I eat! Well, maybe not the 1st time - I had to TRY and watch what I ate in college when I gained 30 pounds because I smoked so much pot and chowed down on EVERYTHING all the time. But by and large, as long as I exercise, I've always been able to eat ANYTHING and EVERYTHING I wanted to, but being off of dairy and wheat suucks! I think I'll stick with it, though because the only difference I've noticed (besides being starving) is that my mood seems better. Maybe I'm in a half starved stupor, or maybe being off the 'junk' is good for me? I did wolf down some cheese yesterday and I was in a cranky mood later on. Cecilia on the other hand doesn't stutter AT ALL and doesn't complain of tummy aches except for "pretend" ones (when she wants a tummy soother or for me to rub her tummy at night) and she is totally craving fat, too. I let her sit on the counter and dig into the new jar of mayonaise with a spoon today. I have pictures. She ate about a tablespoon and then said, "All done." And went and played. I remember when I was in Mexico for two months, in my twenties, we ate nothing but fish and veggies (because that's all that was around) and by the 2nd month, we ate mayonaise and tortillas because we were craving fat. Come to think of it, I suppose that is the reason my pants fit a little tight when I returned from that trip. Ah - Mayonaise. I love you mayonaise.
I've been trying to get my friend Jackie to start a blog. This was her response: "It's funny that you mentioned me starting a blog. Several of my friends from the Keys have been bugging me to start one. I kinda feel like I don't really have anything that interesting to talk about. Today's entry would be something like . . . I woke up this morning to Hudson standing next to my bed singing "I have the biggest booker in the world, in my in my nose" (to the tune of Old MacDonald Had A Farm.) He proceeded to pick it out and then tried to wipe it on my (aformentioned sexy) jammies. When Quinn woke up, he rolled over and farted so loud that Hudson blamed it on me. He then stuck his nose in my butt to see if I was lying. Good times, man. Good times."
See - Jackie Sedaris is totally funny. I guess all my favorite people are funny.
Man - I've been doing the love instead of fear or ambition thing with the girls and I love it! We end up laughing more often. For instance, instead of saying, "Brush your teeth! We don't want to be that stink mouth family! (har har.)" I say, "You have to give your teeth some love, too. Your teeth help you chew all your food up so you have energy!" Then I still add a little bit of fear, "If you don't love your teeth, they could all fall out and then . . . then . . . then . . . " and Francesca says, "I would have to snort all my food up my nose?" And we laugh and laugh and laugh, imagining snorting our food up our noses.
So, it could be my imagination, but Cecilia's hair seems to be getting thicker. Result of ortho bionomy and wheat-free, gluten-free, dairy-free diet? Or just getting more hair? I can't help but think its all related. What isn't? Its like that song, "Your head bone's connected to your neck bone, your neck bone's connected to your chest bone . . . " its all connected, right? You, me, we.
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